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"Family
Practice" • 5.22.16 • Calvary
Christian Fellowship, Sunday Morning Service
Intro.
- One can only imagine the great benefit that
this letter had with Timothy. It has been a clear and concise statement, which
has cut through any and all confusion that he might have experienced.
- Beginning at chapter 4:12, Paul has focused upon Timothy's relationship to his position
as the Pastor of the church of Ephesus.
- Today, we'll see that Paul addresses his
relationship to the congregation in general, especially to those in great need.
Verse 1.
Text
•
I Timothy 5:1,2 : "Do not rebuke an older man, but
exhort him as a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger
women as sisters, with all purity." : "Rebuke"
comes from a word which refers to striking. Timothy was not to strike out
verbally at a man that was a "Presbyteros."
-
This could be a generic word for an older man, but is also synonymous with a
church elder.
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Timothy was not to ignore unpleasant conversations or his duties related to
correction, instruction and rebuke. These are necessary elements in any
Pastor's life.
-
But what was to be avoided was the language which would elevate a discussion to
a verbal altercation. Timothy should avoid becoming harsh in his confrontations
with men that were his senior.
-
He is instead to exhort an older man as a Father. He must come alongside of him,
to intreat him toward godly actions. "Sir, please consider your actions
and do the right thing."
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As a young man, the tendency might be to become harsh and dominating. Paul is
telling Timothy that his method should be gentle and understanding.
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He's to look at older men with the respect that his society would have for a
Father. In Rome, that would have been a very high standard. The key is
reverence and respect.
-
Likewise, he's to exhort younger men as if they were his brothers. The
"non-rebuke" factor is still in play. Timothy isn't to be a
domineering older brother because he is the Pastor.
-
When it comes to women in the church, Timothy was to treat the elder women as
mothers and younger women as sisters. Mothers and sisters!
-
Paul is telling Pastor Timothy that he is to look at the assemble congregation
as an extension of his own family. They aren't his charges or people. He is to
relate to them by faith and blood!
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When it comes to the sisters, Timothy was to look at them with all purity. The
young ladies shouldn't feel for a moment that they are being ogled or treated
in an unbecoming way.
-
For Ladies, being loved purely without intention, is a rare gift in this world.
-
Every woman that walks through our door should feel the love of Christ seeking
their greatest spiritual blessing, beginning with the Pastor and following
throughout the brotherhood.
•
I Timothy 5:3-5 : "Honor widows who are really widows.
But if
any widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show piety at
home and to repay their parents; for this is good and acceptable before God. Now she who is really a widow, and
left alone, trusts in God and continues in supplications and prayers night and
day." : In the first century, given the
high mortality rate of men, becoming a widow was very real and devastating
possibility.
-
One of the first issues confronted in the church related to the care and
concern of the widows that were a part of the Jerusalem church. (Acts 6:1)
-
From that verse, we can see that the church took on the role of distributing
food to widows on a daily basis, reflecting immediately the heart of God.
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The Pastor of Jerusalem Christian Fellowship would even mandate that the care
of widows and orphans would mark true and undefiled religion. (James 1:27)
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God has a special place in His heart for these people, primarily because their
lot in life is determined by Him. Widows and orphans have not arrived there by
their own choices.
-
It's with this in mind that Paul commands Timothy to always make a practice of
esteeming widows. He is to support and give proper recognition to those that
are truly widows.
-
Every woman who has cared for their husband unto death is a widow, but not all share
in the same circumstances.
-
Timothy, being a young man and a Pastor, might have simply wanted to help every
woman in these desperate straits equally. Paul makes sure that he makes
discerning choices.
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The first choice that Timothy is to investigate relates to surviving family who
held the primary responsibility to care for their Mother or Grandmother.
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Children who call themselves Christian are called by God to care for their
bereaved parents. That is what the physical, human family unit is designed for.
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Listen to Paul's words: "Let them
first learn to show piety at home!" "First" not in order of
the day, but in terms of priority.
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If their godliness is to mean anything in the church it must first mean
something in the home! Caring for the Mom that is a true widow first is
considered a due repayment in the eyes of God!
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When God sees that, He deems it good and it agrees with Him! Notice then,
Timothy's dual committment. He's to consider caring for the widow, but not to
act in a way that interferes with family.
-
He must help the widow's family by not stepping in to relieve them of their God
given duty!
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Barring that family unit, Paul tells Timothy to also understand that there are
limits to what he could do. A real widow on her own is to put her trust in God,
not the church!
-
For a widow with family, the church is not to function as one. Neither is the
church to function as a Savior when the widow has One!
-
A true widow that Timothy is to assist is always, perpetually, trusting in the
Lord for her provision and her prayer life proves it!
-
She's constantly in the throne room of God, calling out for His mercy, grace
and provision!
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Timothy would be putting pressure upon himself and the resources of the church
if he sought to be the "end all" point of provision for any and all
widows!
-
At the same time, he would be robbing the widow of the necessity that she has
to see the Lord as her provider, indeed as her true and living Husband!
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Timothy was to be responsive to God as an answer to the widow's prayer, not as
a replacement to the One that she was praying to! There were other kinds of
widows as well. Verse 6.
•
I Timothy 5:6-8 : "But she who lives in pleasure is
dead while she lives. And these things command, that they may be blameless. But if anyone does not provide for
his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and
is worse than an unbeliever." : There
was apparently a type of widow that sought to cast off any restraint after her mate
had passed.
-
"Lives in pleasure" speaks to living in luxury, without regard to
moral constraint. Her purpose is to explore every pleasure that had alluded her
during her time in marriage.
-
That person seems to have a life, but she is living dead! That's the biblical
injunction against all that live in such a way. Outwardly, they are alive, but
inwardly, to God, they are dead!
-
A family and a church has no business providing for a widow with a record like
this. Timothy was to command them to understand, to make the distinction
between the two.
-
Why? So that they would be blameless. In what respect? With respect to enabling
or endorsing a life that is contrary to the faith.
-
But let it be clear that they are to make that distinction. They aren't to
withhold their support because of a lack of desire to help. They will never
refuse "need" but will certainly refuse "wants."
-
Paul explicitly tells Timothy that a person that was not in the state of
providing for their own family had denied the faith! This refers to those with
a physical and spiritual family.
-
Im convinced that Paul shares this principle and means to have it apply to the
church.
-
Before we look out into the world or even into other churches, we had better be
sure to take care of our own! What then does it mean to "provide."
-
The word speaks of foreseeing, understanding a need in advance, and then,
meeting that need. There is forethought involved and concern over the person in
question.
-
They are to do this, especially, particularly, for those of their own
household. That is a given, fundamental practice of the faith. A person or
church refusing to do this has denied the faith.
-
This person or group is living in complete contradiction, proving their
confession to be false in that moment based on their unwillingness to act.
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Most people tend to look at faith in a category by itself, divorced from
actions or works.
-
Au contraire! Our works prove or validate our faith confession. Our works
confess what faith we possess! Faith is the root and works are the fruit!
˚
"By refusing the natural duties
which Christian faith implies, one practically denies his possession of faith.
Faith does not abolish natural duties, but perfects and strengthens them." Marvin Vincent
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This person, who claims to be of the faith, but denies it in their actions, is
worse than an unbeliever. How is that the case?
-
He is a worse than an unbeliever, in that he doesn't know that he is to respond
to this family member, a fact that his unbelieving counterpart knows and
undertakes willingly.
-
But worse than that, he confesses to believe something that he does not
actually believe. He's fooling himself into thinking that he is a believer, but
is actually not.
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At least an unbeliever carries with him an honest assessment of himself before
God. The person that Paul is addressing does not possess even that grace!
-
Perhaps you know somebody like this, who claims to know and love Christ and
yet, has no ambition to follow after Him in their works. That person is worse
off than an unbeliever!
-
They are utterly deceived about the reality of their own life and the reality
that awaits them!
•
I Timothy 5:9,10 : "Do not let a widow under sixty
years old be taken into the number, and not unless she has been the wife of one
man, well
reported for good works: if she has brought up children, if she has lodged
strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has relieved the
afflicted, if she has diligently followed every good work." : Another distinguishing factor was to be the widow's age. She was
to be 60 and over to be take into the "number."
-
In the ancient church, there was a registry that was taken and a number that
was accounted for. This gives us quite a bit of information.
-
First, there was forethought as to the amount of people that the church could
reasonably care for. There was a number that assistance was limited to.
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One truth about the church that has transcended time and space is that there is
unlimited need and severely limited resources. The church was responsible in
their accounting.
-
Second, the number assumes responsibility and agreement. If anyone registers
for anything, there are immediate rights, conditions and limitations that must
be agreed upon.
-
This is incredibly important to understand especially in light of what he says
next. This widow could be enrolled if she was 60 and had been a faithful wife
to her husband.
-
Immediately you understand that their conditions began with adherance to
scriptural morality. Had she been a "one man woman?" "Had she
only had eyes for one man?"
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The same person would also have a track record of good works that showed that
she was a Christian, the first of which is that she brought up children.
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A person coming to ask for help can't fake her way past the discerning church
with works that were only lately accomplished.
-
She was to have a record of faithfulness at home with her own children. This
could also widely refer to adoption as well as church education!
˚
"The words brought up may
refer to the children of others, who were educated in the Christian faith by pious
Christian women." Adam
Clarke
-
The point is that she has a lifetime of godly decisions in her past that are
visibly seen.
-
She was to be a family woman, but Timothy was also to discover how she had been
toward with strangers. Had she been hospitable? Was she willing to take someone
in?
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Had she washed the saints feet? There may have been a physical foot washing
station that believers experienced before walking into a home fellowship
gathering.
-
Given the unsanitary conditions of the street of Rome, combined with the open
toe footware that was common for the day, it might have been been a necessary
measure!
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On the other hand, it's just as possible that this was a euphemism for humble,
menial and loving service toward the saints.
-
On the last night of Christ's life, he took a towel around his waist and washed
the disciples feet, an act which He said exemplified a servant's attitude
toward one another! (John 13:13-15)
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Had she been a servant to the people in the church in their time of need? Had
she relieved the afflicted near her?
-
Literally, did she provide her strength for those who had been injured? Did she
follow closely after the example of Christ given to her? This is the kind of
widow that the church should attend to.
•
I Timothy 5:11-13 : "But refuse the younger widows; for
when they have begun to grow wanton against Christ, they desire to marry, having condemnation because they have
cast off their first faith. And besides they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to
house, and not only idle but also gossips and busybodies, saying things which
they ought not." : The NKJV sounds awful here!
"Put your hand up and say, "I refuse thee!" The sense is that he
was to beg their pardon.
-
Timothy was sorry that the church could not help in their matter. Eventually,
these younger widows will grow wanton against Christ.
˚
"The word is supposed to be derived
from to remove
and the rein;
and is a metaphor taken from a pampered horse, from whose mouth the rein has
been removed, so that there is nothing to check or confine him. The metaphor is
plain enough, and the application easy." Adam
Clarke
-
The NLT captures this sentiment in their translation well.
•
I Timothy 5:11 (NLT) : "The younger widows should not be on
the list, because their physical desires will overpower their devotion to
Christ and they will want to remarry." : Is Paul
saying that a person who has been widowed shouldn't have the ability to
remarry? In I Corinthians, Paul
actually instructs those with sexual desire to marry.
•
I Corinthians 7:8,9 : "But I say
to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as
I am; but if they cannot exercise
self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with
passion." : With that being the case, the
issue isn't their availability for marriage, but the breaking of their own vow.
-
I mentioned earlier that there were conditions for being on the widow list.
This widow was, in some way, committed to be a maidservant of the Lord
exclusively.
-
It would seem that if a woman was wanting to be considered for assistance
within the church, she would have to agree to a life of celibacy.
-
Paul's point here is that when a widow agreed to this prematurely and then
decided to re-marry, she would feel condemned by going back on her word, her
first faith, to serve the Lord.
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She was casting off her first priority, a calling that she claimed to accept.
In this way, Paul is sparing them the ill-feelings that they would have about
themselves.
-
Maybe this was Timothy's first exposure to the realities related to
administrating the roll.
-
Paul had been down this road before and observed some who had learned to be
idle, slow, the picture of laziness.
-
With all their free time affored them by church assistance, they strolled
around aimlessly.
-
With nothing to do and nobody to serve, they would tend to gossip meaning
literally to "bubble up." They gather in useless chatter over
fruitless things.
-
This chatter isn't really the worst thing, but it's pointlessness lends to a
spirit that eventually turns towards meddling into other people's affairs.
- In that kind of unstructured environment,
their many words eventually lead down a path that they should not have gone in
the first place.
• I Timothy
5:14,15 : "Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children,
manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully. For some have already turned aside
after Satan." : Paul isn't commanding the
young widows to marry. Some may not have wanted that.
- But more often than not, a younger widow
would eventually desire to make that choice, so let them find their God
appointed fulfillment in marriage, bearing and raising children.
- Let them manage their own house. Ladies will
like this and men will agree. The word for manage comes from a word related to
a "despot!" She is to rule her home.
- Consider the difference. Had she committed to
the widow's role, she eventually would have been lazy in her own affairs and
sought to get involved in others.
- Here, this younger widow eventually takes all
of that God given energy and puts it toward her own home! In that way, the
enemy has no base of operations from which to slander her!
- That's the word for "opportunity."
It speaks of a military outpost within range of attack. As she busies herself
there, that base of wicked intent cannot be established!
- Sadly, Paul lets Timothy know that some had
already been twisted and turned about by Satan. When this word was used
medically, it referred to dislocated limbs.
- In context, you can see that some who had
been allowed to commit early were now living in the throes of Satan's work.
This doesn't mean that they were Satan worshippers!
- They were twisted and turned, not following
Satan, but feeling the effect of his destructive ministry. Here is the best
reason for Timothy to say "no."
• I Timothy
5:16 : "If any believing man or woman has widows, let them
relieve them, and do not let the church be burdened, that it may relieve those
who are really widows." : As Paul finishes, he
reinforces what he has already said. Let the believers do the work that they
are equipped to in relieving needs.
- The church's resource should be focused upon
those that have true need.
Conclusion
- How may we
relieve those that are truly destitute? Let's recount Paul's instruction to
Timothy and make the appropriate applications. When being asked for assistance,
ask these questions.
- First, Where is your family? If so, it is
their duty to show the reality of their faith at home. (3,4)
- Second, What need do you have? We are under no
obligation to provide for "wants," especially those which relate to
carnal pleasure. (v.6,7)
- Third, Where do you go to church? That church
should be their first call. If they have refused, then there are reasons. (v.8)
- Fourth, What proof do you have that your faith in
Christ is real? Spiritual children, service and a willingness to be useful
to the Kingdom should be spoken of. (v.9,10)
- These four
questions will greatly serve your discernment as you seek to bless others in
need. May I also add that the text supplies us with wisdom as to how we manage
resource.
- This text
implies stewardship and if we are to be wise with what God gives each of us, we
will observe the following about the giving institution.
- First, discernment is necessary. This whole
section speaks of it. Every request for need must be met with an eye to
discerning it's validity.
- Second, resource is limited. (v.9) The church had a number that it
would account for. There was a budget for this.
- Third, behavior is monitored. (v.11-15) The church did not simply give
assistance to anyone that wished to remain anonymous or unaccountable.
- Finally, giving is our privilege. When we have
the opportunity, we know that it's good and acceptable to God and a practical
way to prove the authenticity of our faith.
- The person
that we encounter in such straits has been praying and God has sent them our
way to be His hands and help toward them.
- When we have
a clear conscience and mandate from the Lord, there is no greater joy than to
serve the ones He sends us. May He give us that wisdom and privilege.
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