Sunday Morning Service

Ephesians 5:21-33

Audio Access Available Above

“A Living Illustration” • 9.15.13 • Calvary Christian Fellowship, Sunday Morning Service

Intro.

- Paul the Apostle has told us of the phenomenal blessings that God has bestowed upon us in Jesus Christ. The blessings flow from Him and cover the entirety of our salvation history.

- He has left us here on earth to be an expression of His artistry. What sort of people then are we as Christians to be? That's the subject of the second half of Ephesians.

- We are to walk worthy or equal to our confession toward the goal of maturity in Christ. We are to walk in love, living an example of a joyous vice free life, exposing darkness, not reveling in it!

- We are to walk circumspectly, filled with His Holy Spirit, making the most of every opportunity to serve His Kingdom.

- This is simply a reasonable response of love toward Him and none of what He has prescribed or is prescribing is even a possibility apart from the indwelling work of God's Holy Spirit.

- He is the One who works in us both to will and to do!

- I offer this prolonged introduction especially now as Paul moves us into the realm of our relationship together as a church and the most intimate of relationships on earth, marriage.

- What does a Holy Spirit led church look like? What does a marriage touched by God's Spirit look like?

Text

• Ephesians 5:21 : "Submitting to one another in the fear of God." : A mark of the Christian life, filled with the Holy Spirit is submission to one another in the church.

- This is an ironic turn given the wind of doctrine that blows through the church every so often. which blames the Spirit for disorder and inconsistency. Far from it.

- "Submission" when used in a military context, speaks of an arrangement, an order of procession. Outside of the military context, it speaks of a voluntary attitude of cooperation.

- The church functions best when there is an atmosphere of cooperation and personal commitment to God's plan for you, expressed in your willing obedience to Him.

- In the church, spiritual gifts and callings are assigned by the Lord and the church body recognizes and honors that.

- In the ancient world as in today, a man or woman could be the focal point of a fortune 500 company on weekdays, but a very willing, yet silent deacon on Sunday.

- Are we to do this in the fear of man? Not at all! We respect men all people, but we are to fall under this God given structure out of a reverance for the Lord and His work.

- That's what the church is: The Lord's work! This is often where we stumble. We associate the church with a person, generally the Pastor. It would be much healthier to consider the church "ours."

- Together, we reverence Christ, we reverence our God. Paul is saying that our reverence for Him will be seen in our submission to one another!

- Where else do you see men and women sitting under the teaching, in many places, of men who are uneducated in the eyes of the world, but are annointed of God to lead?

- I have seen Men who are power players within major corporations sit at the feet of young Christians with their Bibles and eyes wide open!

- I remember a specific person who faithfully worked the lights on Sunday, submitting to the young man with no leadership experience, but who did have a call from God on his life to lead.

- That woman was the Vice President of Taco Bell and one of the most faithful and patient  saints that I ever had the privilege to know!

- God calls us all to lay aside what we are and humbly serve where He has planted us. We do that by the power of His Holy Spirit and by committing ourselves to one another.

- This is a tremendous verse, especially today when the gathering of the saints together is viewed often as a priority only when no other priority competes!

- Paul's instruction here might be viewed as anachronistic, given for another time, but it's not the living counsel of God's Word that is out of step, it's our attitudes that are on trial!

- Are you submitted to one another? Are you open to others' instruction and correction or are you hiding among the sheep, hoping that nobody notices you? That's not God's plan for you or I.

- Paul takes us from the church to the Home. Take a look at verse 22.

• Ephesians 5:22-24 : "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." : Is this double submission!? Paul anticipates a potentially troubling issue of dividing married Ladies from their family commitments.

- Wives are first to submit themselves, to arrange themselves behind their own husbands. Notice first that this is not a prohibition, but a priority.

- Wives, your first ministry, the first priority that you will always have will be to arrange yourself behind your husband's lead.

- You are to do this, Paul says, as unto the Lord, or as you would to the Lord Himself. This is the primary way that you reveal your worship to the Lord, if you are a married woman.

- Why does He say this? I believe it's for the sake of the family and the wife in particular.

- It's no secret that women are more spiritually inclined to serve than men.

- Paul is saying to the wives that they need to clear ministry reponsibilities with their own husbands. No church leader can just pull a lady aside and put her to work.

- This verse protects the godly wife within the church from being used and abused or from giving into the temptation of escaping a troubled marriage for the delights of service.

- God is thinking of the wife and His Word to them within the church is to submit first to their husbands, not on account of inferiority, but on account of priority.

- The wife is in every way equal to her husband. Paul says this in Galatians 3:28 when he writes, "There is now neither male or female, for you are all one in Christ."

- Paul is avoiding mass chaos at the church and the appearance of evil, as the church could easily overburden a willing woman to the neglect of her family.

- Paul tells the church that if anyone is going to serve in the church, they must serve their family responsibilities first.

- Now, a word to the wise. If you are a woman seeking to be a wife, one of your primary criteria in confirming a husband should be this: Can I arrange myself behind this man?

- A single lady has the joy of freely serving the Lord in any way that they deem right.

- Paul spoke about this when he spoke to the Corinthians about marriage. A virgin, or an unmarried woman, cares for the things of the Lord. (I Corinthians 7:34)

- When a woman enters into marriage, she is entering into a living illustration of Christ's relationship to His church is. The husband, God decrees is the head of the wife.

- God holds the husband responsible for the direction of the family that He has been entrusted with. Jesus is the head of the church and the Savior of the body.

- Women, if you are married, your husband is your head. If you are a woman and not married, would the person you want to be married to, be a good, strong head?

- The husband is the wife's leader, protector, and primary spiritual covering. Paul says that the husband is the superintendent of his wife's sanctification as Christ is the provider of her justification!

- He asks the question: Is this good for her? Does she have the time, capacity and gifiting to do this given the responsibilities that she already has?

- Therefore, because of that reality, let the wife submit to her husband in everything. Everything? Yes everything legal and loving.

- Everything in keeping with that which builds you up toward Christ and which is an expression of loving protection.

- A man who asks you to submit to things that are perverted or that might be illegal in nature, you are not to submit to. The Lord will give discernment in those areas.

- Otherwise, wives, in everything, whether it be related to the church, or to the finances or to the place where the family is located, be submissive.

- Two more points here. First, notice that there is not a qualifier. The Bible does not say, "Submit to your own husbands if they are godly and deserving of your respect."

- It's very likely that many of the Ladies that Paul is addressing were married to men that were not Christians and the ones that were, were just learning what Christianity was!

- Second, understand that submission does not equal manumission! You are not your husband's slave. You are his equal, valued in Christ at the premium of His own blood!

- You are to offer your prayers, your counsel, your wisdom and the knowledge of God's Word to every situation that requires it.

- When you feel uneasy about something, you need to voice it. When you sense that your husband may not see the nuances of a decision, you need to make him aware of it!

- But here is the point of submission: When you have given him all of this, back off and pray that he makes the right decision for your family! Now, for the husbands.

• Ephesians 5:25-27 : "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish." : If husbands are to the wife what Christ is to the church, then their imitation of that privilege of headship is to love their wives!

- Paul writes this in the voice of a command. He is commanding these husbands to love. That is interesting to me. Boys, love is not a feeling. Love is a choice, a decision of your own will.

- Husbands are to agape, the same love that Christ has for His church, their own wives! Husbands are to love their wives in the same manner as Christ loved the church!

- I've always found this to be an amazing concept, as we know that Jesus was not married while living here on Earth. Indeed, He waits for His bride even now.

- But before He has been able to be with His bride, Jesus secured His bride's position by giving Himself for her on the Cross, paying her debt in full and freeing her to be the woman she should be!

- He cleared away anything that would have interrupted her love for Him. He gave Himself toward that end, that He might sanctify, or set her, the Church, apart for holiness.

- The Cross was love in advance, the result being a people that were free to be God's servants and Christ's Bride! He then cleansed her with the washing or bathing of water by the Word.

- The word "word" here speaks of a spoken, living, applicable word. What does this refer to?

- Husbands are to bathe their wives in God's Word, both quoting and interpreting passages in appropriate settings, for appropriate moments!

- The man of God who is a husband must have a deep abiding commitment to ingesting God's Word. Otherwise, how can you have a reservoir from which to speak toward a moment?

- How can you answer with God's Word when it's not in you or I?

- How can she respond to God's Word if you are not providing an example of reading it on your own initiative, reading it out loud with her or referring to it during times of difficulty?

- God has given His church the Word and He has cleansed us by it. Why? So that He would present her, the church, to Himself a glorious, an esteemed and noble church!

- This word has also be translated "to stand beside" in approval. The idea is that Jesus is working in the life of the church by His Word, to present or bring us near to Himself for intimacy.

- Husbands, you are to love your wives this way, knowing that she is part of Christ's bride, the church. How does she look? How is she spiritually?

- Are you investing in her walk with Christ? Are you pointing her in His direction? Does she trust Him more because you trust Him more?

- The church that Christ imagines is such that is without spot or wrinkle or any such thing. She is set apart for God, without any moral stain to her name.

- Husbands, listen to this: Christ is working in us to present us to Himself without moral stain. Are you satisfied with what is allowed in your home with that goal in mind?

- Are you careful with content, guarding both her eyes and her heart before the Lord? This requires constant attention and discernment Gentlemen!

• Ephesians 5:28-30 : "So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones." : A Christian husband ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. Jesus has a body that He has loved.

- You are to have that same view of your own wife! Consider her as your own body!

- Paul is not speaking here of how a man relates to his own physical body, though that might be an upgrade spiritually for some men!

- Please do provide food for her and please do treat her in a special way. But that's barely the minimum. When you take a bride, you become one with her. You become one body.

- Yes, you are two people, but mystically, you are one entity, one corporation. Before you are married, you think in terms of individuality.

- Today, you are considered in terms of your wife as well. It's not longer "Frank." It's "Frank and Lela."

- Paul says, "God has made the two of you one. If you invest into your wife, if you love her, you are really benefitting yourself!"

- Nourish, nurture and support her toward maturity in Christ. That will benefit you when you sense the call to serve the Lord!

- Share with her what you are learning in scripture. Speak to her about what is weighing on your heart spiritually. This will cause you to grow to maturity together.

- You are to nourish and cherish her. "Cherish" literally means to keep her warm. The idea is to anticipate her need and meet her there as one would with a warm blanket or the stoking of a fire.

- That's what the Lord does for His church! That's how He responds to us who are joined to Him as one body! This is why He blesses us, for in so doing, He blesses Himself!

• Ephesians 5:31-33 : "'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.' This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband." : For this reason, the reason of Christ's care for His church, a man shall leave his Father and mother and be joined to his wife!

- It's Christ's love for the church on display through the illustration of a loving marital relationship! Paul quotes here from Genesis 2:24. Let me take you back in a short synopsis.

- Adam had looked at his bride and virtually jumped up for joy! He had been privileged to work for the Lord, categorizing animals who had compatible partners for procreation.

- Along the journey, Adam realized that he did not have a partner. God had given Adam the desire and then performed the first surgical procedure in scripture.

- From a single rib, God the Creator, brought woman into existence and when Adam woke up, he realized that this was the helper that he needed.

- Now, Adam would primarily attend to the care of his wife, one who was literally bone and flesh with him, setting a precedent in marriage that speaks of leaving one family to begin another one!

- The man is to be joined to his wife. The word speaks to the concept of being glued or fastened together.

- That's what Paul is talking about. Two beings are meant to be glued together in such an intimate way that they become inseparable from one another.

- Now, Paul is talking about marriage between humans, but at the same time, something has been uncovered that has been hidden. This institution is a picture of Christ and His church.

- The bride of Christ, the church, is to submit unto her husband, who is the head of the church. We are to lovingly allow Him to lead and guide us.

- He frees us to serve Him, giving us what we can handle, never pushing us beyond the scope of His grace to sustain us.

- He opens His Word to us and showers us with it's intention, not simply it's syntax.

- He shares His heart with us and gives us His Holy Spirit to know when we are taking in content that we should not be content with!

- Paul has been carried away for a moment thinking of the magnitude and sacred nature of Christian marriage.

- This is why he says, "nevertheless" back to the basics, men, love your wives as yourself and women, respect your husbands.

Conclusion
- Let me ask you something: What if things were reversed? Men, if you were your wife, would submitting to you be a natural and appealing thing, given the way that you lead?

- Are you easy to follow, clear in your own direction and godly in your decision making? Would you submit to you?

- Ladies, in a similar fashion, if you were your husband, would you find yourself lovely in your attitude about life, marriage and the Lord's Word and work?

- Before you condemn or commend yourself, this is a work of His grace that gives us a vision for what He intends. Perhaps you have not been living it. Today is the day to say, "Yes Lord, I will!"